Yeah, I’m inconsistent, but lets just pretend that this is my third day posting in a row. Maybe, I’ll even post twice today and pretend it is a two separate days.

Now that we’ve got that settled, I want to talk about a thing. A lot of people have been bring up the fact that I look super awkward and act super awkward in the videos I’m in for college nation. I AM AWARE. I just was not aware at the time. Because one, I have never been in a setting like that on video with other people. I need to get used to it. I act different in my own videos because I am comfortable being myself when I’m the only one around. It’s different being around people I haven’t known for very long with other people in the room watching you and reacting to what you do. I decided to do this because I want to get experience in doing more things like College Nation. Yes, I appreciate the pointer but I also do realize that I do zone out when I’m not talking and will be more aware of it the next time I am in something. I again want to say that when I film my own videos I’m usually the only one talking so I don’t really know what to do when I’m sat in a chair and someone else is talk. On top of that, I tend to have a bit of socially anxiety and act weird when I’m in a setting where I am even the least bit uncomfortable. I also have complete control when I make my own videos and decide what I want to cut out or keep in. I guarantee that I will be more entertaining and less awkward when I become more accustomed to and comfortable in that setting.

ALSO, people have always said “Bitota you act so different in your YouTube videos than you do in real life” UhHMmm OKAy. I don’t expect everyone to act the exact same in every social setting. Again, when I am alone with just my camera I feel I can be my complete weird self because I am my only judge, (well along with the internet). I can’t really explainย  it but the camera is like my greatest release. It’s like journaling for some people. If you know me in real life I’m awkward but I honestly love my awkwardness at times when I can channel it to be funny or make people uncomfortable. It also bugs me when people think that I am so outgoing and can prosper in any social setting, because it honestly takes a lot for me at times to be social and not not awkward.

That is all for now,

thanks for listening


2 thoughts on “YES, IM AWKWARD

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